The reason is very simple to understand. When a child misbehaves on a regular basis, it is because he finds what he is doing is working.

For example, let’s say you child has a problem with another child in school. The other child teases him. Your child can react many different ways. He can react is by smacking the other child, by beating him up, or by intimidating him.

Any of these approaches may insure that the child will not tease him again. If this happens, your child will learn that using intimidation or physical force can solve his problems.

What this means is that your child has stumbled upon a socially unacceptable way to solve a problem he is facing. If he gets away with behaving this way, your child may test the use of intimidation or physical force in other challenging situations. If he continues on this path he will adapt this approach for other problems and may eventually become a bully.

One thing you have to understand is people always choose the easiest path to solve problems. If your child is doing a bad behavior consistently, it is because that he finds it works to get him want he wants. You use consequences and discipline to change that.

What you have to do is use consequences as part of your child discipline strategy to show your child that there are better behavior options. You use consequences to make the appropriate behavior a better and easier option to follow.

For example, if your child curses or talks back, and this is a frequent problem, it is because he found talking back and cursing work for him in certain situations, like when he is angry. You use consequences to teach him that when he is angry it is a better option for him to go to his room and cool off.

That is how consequences are supposed to work. What usually happens is something quite different. Parents punish their children or give a consequence and either nothing happens or the child becomes resentful and behaves even worse. This is because you are using consequences incorrectly. If you do not use consequences correctly, you will not change your child’s behavior.

I have created a video for you that is going to explain to you why that is. In this video I discuss the #1 mistake parents make in giving consequences and what you can do to avoid this mistake.

Go now to:

#1 Child Discipline Mistake Video.